Sitting here tonight I realize how surreal this whole thing is. I watch baby shows all the time, follows blogs, get weekly updates from three different pregnancy trackers, and have read the entire "What to Expect When You're Expecting" and yet it still doesn't quite feel real all the time.
Even weirder is watching/reading things that I did in the past, but now can relate to more since I'm actually pregnant. Case in point: tonight I am watching E! and the episode of Kendra where she gives birth came on. It's such a good episode because it covers a lot of the stuff that (I imagine) happens in the last month or so of pregnancy. Right now she is in the hospital in labor and it's so weird to think I will be there soon.
We just had our 28-week doctor appointment today, and she told us that from now on we are supposed to come in every two weeks. I was like, already?!?! I mean, it's exciting because it means this whole pregnancy thing is coming to an end, I'll finally be able to see his cute little face, and I'll have control of my body again! But it's also frightening because I am totally, seriously afraid. I hate pain...like seriously. I am nervous about the contractions...the early ones especially, you know, where you are still at home trying to decide if it's too early to go to the hospital. Nervous about how different our lives are going to be once he does come. Nervous about making our marriage work, finding a balance between work (hopefully) and motherhood that make sense to me...etc...
On another note, bought some nursing bras online from Target, but it's so hard to decide if I want to keep them. I had to order them in a cup size larger than I am now (since this is what they say you grow once the milk comes in), so my choices were limited. Since I am currently a 36DD, I had to find some that were 36DDD/E! No easy task, let me tell you. So I bought a few from Bravado, but they are obviously too big to really get an idea right now. And even though they are cuter than some others I have seen, nothing is cute at that size. Is it just me or do people assume that big breasted women don't want cleavage?! All the bras are cut so high up, you could never wear anything that is even remotely v-neck or low cut. Frustrates me. As if we don't feel unsexy enough, now we have to wear huge, grandma bras! ::sigh::
All these things people never tell you about pregnancy... I should write a book, I tell you. Sex, Lies, and Pregnancy...seems apt to me!
I agree with you. Regardless of how big i got each month, I still didnt realize I would have a baby until the end. I mean, I knew I was going to have a baby, but it was so unbelievable that I was baking one inside of me. It was just such a miracle, that although I teach science for a living, the science part of me couldnt believe it. Amazing Indeed!
ReplyDeleteAnd yes... At the same time, I just wanted control of my body again. I just recently have started to feel that again. Maybe within the last month or so. But dont worry, time flies by. My baby girl is going to be 9 months next week! Get your camera ready, yours is coming soon. How exciting!