To Work or Not to Work

...that is the question that's been on my mind the last few weeks.  You see, I spent the first four months of Nash's existence at home with him...and I was MISERABLE.  I hadn't worked in a year (the job market is uber lame here), Nash wasn't sleeping at all, and I was so tired and bitter, I really needed a break.

That break came in the form of a job offer from a former co-worker who got a gig as the new Market Manager for our radio stations.  I knew I'd have a good time because she was a super cool chick and radio's always fun.  Well, let's just say things don't always work out.

Flash forward a few months and everything is different.  Nash sleeps GREAT now...taking two naps that are 1.5-2 hours long!  And he sleeps good at night too, so no more being exhausted.  He's so much fun, and I feel like I'm missing it all.  I'm so grateful that Joe gets to stay home with him most days, but I'm really jealous and feel like it's a mama's job.

To top it off, the girl I was working for just quit.  So now the VP of the WHOLE COMPANY is in town to be my boss for the next month.  I like him a lot, but he's intense.  And it's going to be a lot of work (he wants to change EVERYTHING).  And I was considering quitting before my friend left because it's just not that fun.  I don't like the work I'm doing, I barely see my little man, and I don't even get paid a lot.

 This? or This?

So I've written my "I Resign" letter, but I haven't sent it.  I haven't because I'm nervous about the confrontation.  I'm nervous about everyone thinking I'm quitting because it's too much work, or too hard (it's not).  And I'm nervous because I think Joe might want me to stay.  He's never come out and said, "You need to stay," but he seems a bit bothered by my severe dislike of my current situation.  At the same time, he likes the idea of saying $150 a week on childcare!

So what's a girl to do?