My poor little man has been sick. It started simply enough with him having some super smelly, frequent diapers. We thought, hmmm, that's different. Then there were the last 3 days of Cranky McCrankerson. Couldn't figure out why he was so clingy and whiny...he would literally burst into tears for no reason. And this kid is super happy...almost NEVER cries. And he hasn't been wanting to drink his milk or eat (and this kid LOVES to eat). So, we're perplexed.
On Tuesday night, I put him to bed like normal, although he was a bit fussy. Around 2 am or something, I hear him stirring a bit. I don't run in there because I ran in there the other night and shoved a bottle into his mouth before realizing that he wasn't even really that awake... I was so tired, I just ran in and didn't wait to see if he would fall back asleep. So not wanting to do that again, I lied in bed and waited. And he fell back asleep.
Wednesday morning, I get up, take a shower, and can't wait to smooch my Bubs. Joe goes into his room with a bottle, like normal...then comes into the bathroom. He says, "Hey Honey, look at this stuff all over his jammies." I get close...and sniff. BAM! Big mistake. A wave of vomit-smell invades my nose and my overly sensitive gag reflex kicks in and I nearly barf all over the two of them. I am so bothered by all this, I rip the puke-crusted jammies off the Bubs and go into his room. And there it is. Puke...everywhere. He apparently threw up in the middle of the night and proceeded to lie in it for the rest of the night. It was in his hair, on his face, and all over the sheets and blankets.
I felt like such a horrible mother. To this very instance, I cannot forgive myself for not going in there Tuesday night. I let my baby sleep in his own throw up for who knows how many hours. I feel absolutely, positively terrible...
Thankfully, he's feeling better now...but I'm still upset. Hate that he sleeps so far away, but I know it's part of growing up...I know he can't sleep in my bed forever, but I can't help but think that if he had been, this wouldn't have happened.
I know this feeling! Damned if you do and damned if you don't. If he knew what had happened or if he needed you he would have cried until you went in. I hate that sinking feeling of my baby needed me and I didn't know. I went in to get Raina up for the day and changed her diaper in low light. When I brought her into the light Dan had to point out she had blood all over her face. I guess she had a bloody nose in the middle of the night. She stirred a little that night but we had no idea.
ReplyDeleteAwww poor Raina! I guess we can't be there to protect them all the time...but I sure wish I could!
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