Relating...Big Time

Alright, I am sitting here watching Sex and the City 2 (lord knows why), and I just had a moment. There's a scene where Charlotte is in the kitchen with her two kids (who she longed for so dearly) and she nearly loses it. She yells at her one daughter, then goes and hides in the pantry to cry - ignoring the pleas of her daughters to come out. Wow.

I remember watching this movie the first time and not really thinking much of it, but now it really hits home. I've had that moment. That moment where you feel so in over your head, and you're emotional, and then you're upset that you are so emotional. And it's all just so much. It's a wee bit of regret and then a wave of regret for regretting.

I never knew being a mother would be so hard... I never knew I could feel the strongest of emotions on both sides of the spectrum - absolute, indescribable love for this tiny little magical person and fear, anger, hate, spite, utter sadness.

It's amazing, isn't it? Thank god, I'm leaning more towards the magical, love love, absolute adoration side these days.